The Look

There is a sad blue cloud like a blanket trying to suffocate my heart…
You reminded me of my past,
Smelling all the white flowers on my way, there’s always been something,
That cannot be forgotten,
A question or A look,
A look in my eyes

What’s that everyone wrote about it in my dairies…even the people who don’t know me…
What’s that inside me?

Today, I found out that we have it all when we’re kids and we keep loosing it and forget reminding ourselves of that ….
We drown ourselves in the flow of the 24/7 instead of flowing in the sunrise,
And put our bodies in the little prisons out of boxes,
And try to think that we’re prosper by shooting our anger to other kids,
And we don’t know that we’re killing the little kid with the look in the eyes…

Once I tried to draw it on paper, and it came out unexpectedly good, But I couldn’t find the meaning.

I remember a day when I couldn’t find it in my eyes…
Then I got sad, confused, and I was trying to find it…looking for it everywhere, in the pictures from the past…
I tried not to talk to you, ignore you, and keep it for myself, and you know what, it came back to me….

And after all those years I forgot it again…., I was looking for it again today, here,
In a day like this,
When my eyes aren’t open no more…
And they look red, red like my daycare’s book…red like Panda’s jacket in “Panda and the snow”,
Red like my swollen gums….
And I know that look is still there, no need for a mirror, I can feel it, stronger than ever,

But all the reasons behind it?!
Still, I don’t know…